It's finally kicked in.

I finally feel very pregnant. In actual fact, am feeling like I ate a beach ball and have yet to figure a way to get it out! All of those horrid side effects of being sprogged up are kicking in. Tree trunk ankles, a.k.a. swollen ankles; aching pelvis (that's always a good one); falling asleep at the ungodly hour of 9:15p.m.; waking up at the crazed hour of 2a.m. thinking it's time to go to work (because I slept all evening); heartburn...do you get my point yet? Funny thing is, all in all, it's been uneventful and for once in my life, that's a good thing.

I'm looking forward to the return of the following:
1. Sleeping on my back or my stomach again.
2. Drinking caffeinated tea. I've come to realize caffeine is a very important part of tea.
3. Wearing high heels...oh how I miss you girls.
4. Wearing clothes that suit me more than 'normal girl' pregnancy gear.
5. Breathing. Many of you may not realize this, but at some point in a pregnancy your baby will take to sitting on your diaphragm, thus making it feel like, well, someone is sitting on your diaphragm.
6. Drinking diet pop. I say this, but I have decided to give up pop in the new year...a gal can still dream.

I'm looking forward to experiencing:
1. What this whole experience is leading up to...our son. OMG! That sounded so real. Never fear, we have a girl's name picked out just in case the technician was wrong.
2. A bond with someone whom I've never met before.
3. A smile.
4. Everything.

I could go on forever about the things I am looking forward to, whether it be related to me or the baby.

The crib and change table arrived today and I am thrilled! I will be even more thrilled when the sun comes up tomorrow and I can get a proper look at it. See, we haven't quite sorted out a lighting situation for the baby's room yet, so I can only see the gorgeous silhouettes of the furniture - ha ha! There are still a number of items that we need to get, or so we think. I would like to get a Baby Bjorn Active carrier so that we don't always have to wheel around a stroller. Although I'll be buggered if those strollers don't get some wicked use after all of the hard work and research my Mom and I put into them!

For those of you who are counting along with me, there are 48 days left until d-day. Funny that, I can actually call it d-day and it makes sense.

One final note to those of you out there who have never been pregnant or closely known someone who is pregnant, I have a few tips. Please keep reading...

1. No matter how innocent your intentions are, never tell a pregnant gal that she is getting soooo big. Pregnant or not, women don't want to hear how big they are getting. I had a hugely fat man tell me today that I was getting to be his size. It was all I could do not to shove a ham sandwich down his throat.
2. Never touch a pregnant gal's bump without asking first. Further, don't ask to touch the bump if you don't know her very well, 'cause that's just weird. One day she may just rub your belly back. How would you feel then?
3. Telling a pregnant gal she should or shouldn't be eating or drinking something is a definite no-no. If you don't think it's suitable to the baby, I'm sure your inner voice would love to have a discussion with you. Remember, you don't know everything and neither does she, but she's sure entitled to do what she wants.
4. Don't ask her if she plans on having more children before she's even given birth to the one in her! Trial run is required.
5. Am I going back to work? I haven't even stopped going yet! The answer is, I don't know. I had no idea how irritating this question could be until I became pregnant. I'm sorry Mari for asking you this very early on in your pregnancy.
6. Remember to be polite. I know it's almost 2006 and some of our lovely and hairy feminists have made men feel like crap for opening doors for women, or giving up your seat on the Skytrain, but please, don't punish us all. If you see a pregnant woman teetering around on the wobbly train or bus, please offer the seat. Gals, that goes for you too!
7. Lastly, please remember pregnancy isn't your chance to voice all of your opinions you've gathered while reading the magazines in the doctor's office. I know you're trying to be helpful, but telling me I shouldn't be chewing gum because it has aspartame in it doesn't help me. Nor does making me feel like a fish out of water at the building's lobby party and scolding me even though I'm not drinking wine. How is this nice? I'll tell you, it's not.

Addendum: Please note the above passage does not mean that I don't need help or opinions or the support of friends and family. I love you all and will need to turn to you for some much need assistance in the future. The likelihood is, the people whom these comments are directed at probably don't even know that I have a blog, or even feelings. Most of the time these careless people are co-workers; people I can say goodbye to for a year in 8 working days!

The ranting gal.
Allison